Let me off by saying, I am not a doctor. If you feel like you have a real medical condition you should definitely consult with your doctor.
So, one of my friends told me how she’s never horny and never in the mood to have sex. Her boyfriend tries to have sex with her every night, but she’s just not turned on. When I heard this, I had some major déjà vu. After she told me how she just isn’t horny anymore, I told her about my own experience with my ex-boyfriend.
When I was dating my ex, I was never horny. We dated for about three years but, for the last year of our relationship I was just not in the mood anymore. I realized we had nothing in common, but I still wanted to keep our relationship together and keep trying. As time went on, I just never wanted to have sex anymore, and I had no idea why. I am a very horny person and I usually always want to have sex, so I was worried. I thought something was wrong with me. Even if I was alone watching porn, I wouldn’t get horny. We ended up breaking up and BAM, I was horny again. Like the flip of a switch, once he wasn’t in my life anymore, I got horny again.
So, that’s my scenario, I wasn’t in love anymore. I think me, not being horny, was just my body’s way of telling me “He ain’t the one!” My friend insists she’s very in-love with her boyfriend, and she wants to marry him one day. She just does not know why she’s not horny. I figured that if my friend was feeling this way, there are probably many other women experiencing this as well. I thought I would come up with some reasons why women may not want to have sex and then also some tips on how to get yourself in the mood. So, keep reading and I hope this helps!
Reasons You May Not Be Horny:
Time of day
Most people initiate sex at night but, maybe you’re not horny at nighttime. Your lady part are tired and they would rather be sleeping. So, you should just listen to your body throughout the day. Notice when you get turned on, is it in the morning? After lunch? Right when you get off work? It could be whenever, and you should just roll with it. It is normal for someone not to be horny all day, every day, so just take note of when your body is in the mood.
The location
Some people don’t have many locations to do it in and, there’s nothing sexy about having sex in your childhood bedroom with your parent’s downstairs. Even in your bed, maybe you associate your bed with something negative. If you are uncomfortable in the setting that you are in, try doing it somewhere else. Try and find a nice location that you are comfortable in.
Medication
There are many medications that can affect your sex drive. Consider talking to your doctor and finding out your other options.
Insecurities
Maybe you’re not horny because your just so self-conscious about your body. The thought of your partner seeing you naked makes you sick and you just really don’t feel sexy with your clothes off. Try doing it in the dark, or maybe consider working out and eating healthy so you feel better. If nothing works, I recommend talking to a therapist.
They suck at sex
Perhaps you’re not getting horny because your partner sucks at having sex. They aren’t giving you any foreplay, or they don’t know how to please you. Why would you be excited about having sex when you know you’re not even going to cum. You should definitely be communicating with your partner and always letting them know what you like, and don’t like.
You lost feelings
Now for the reason you probably don’t want to hear but, maybe you just don’t like your partner anymore. If you’re not horny, maybe it’s because you’re body is telling you that you are not ment to be with this person. You two have grown apart and this relationship is holding you back from something better
Ways To Get Horny:
Watch porn
Porn can be a very good way to get you in the mood. You and your partner can even watch it together. Or, right before you guys are about to do it, run to the bathroom and put on some sexy clips to get you ready.
Get a sexy outfit
When you feel sexy, you can even turn yourself on. Just get an outfit that you think you look incredibly bomb and scandalous and see how it makes you feel. You will want to show your partner how sexy you look and that can get you in the mood. When you look sexy, you will most likely feel sexy and confident.
Touch yourself
Before you guys have sex, try and run to the bathroom and start to rub yourself. Maybe even put some porn on. Don’t take too long in the bathroom, but just the right amount of time to be ready to go. You can also touch yourself before you go to house, and in the car ride over, just picture the both of you guys having sex.
Listen to a sex podcast
I love learning new sexy tips on sex podcasts. After I learn a new sex tip or position, it makes me want to try it myself. Switching things up in the bedroom and trying new things with your partner can be exciting and can get you in the mood.
Buy a new sex toy
Sex toys can be an amazing way to spice up you sex life. They also make it way easier to cum. If you know there is a guaranteed orgasm, then you will be more inclined to participate in sex. Adam and Eve is a great sex toy brand, I will also link a vibrator from amazon. Both of these companies will send sex toys in discrete packaging!
With all of this being said, there are many reasons on why you might not be horny. It’s totally normal, and most people have experienced it. But, if your partner wants to have sex and you don’t, do not feel pressured to. Make sure the sex is always consensual. If you are determined to make the relationship work and your partner wants to have sex way more than you, they should always respect your decision and make you feel safe and comfortable. I hope this article can help you guys.
